1,2,3...Cha, Cha, Cha.

“Life’s a dance, you learn as you go, sometimes you lead, sometimes you follow. Don’t worry about what you don’t know…life’s a dance and you learn as you go.”-J.M.M.

There are so many different types and ways of dancing. In the competitive world, dancers must master their technique, presentation and choreography. If you think about it, life and dance have a lot of similarities and are practically identical.

In February of this year, I took it upon myself to take a few dance lessons from professional dancer Eric Romero. He’s a San Antonio native and is well traveled throughout the world doing professional ballroom dancing.
One of the first lessons he taught me were through words;

“There are 4 P's in dance; posture, performance, poise and perfection.”

“Posture starts from your core to your head. It is a reflection of your spirit. When you dance you must exert the characteristics of each in the dance which most often must express passion, joy, elegance and anger.”

Performance is taking on the character of the dance.

Poise is sustaining the characteristic throughout routine.

Perfection requires proper leg actions, foot action, arm styling and then comes the combination of putting it all together.

I have never been one to acknowledge true composition in my steps while I dance; I go to the beat and let my body feel the music. When Eric was my teacher, I was automatically deemed the follower. I had to let go and trust my leader. In my nature I like to lead but in this case I had no idea what I was doing as far as the Cha-Cha or Rumba goes. Within my first hour, I picked up the steps pretty fast. I was impressed.

When an unexpected turn comes my way in life I get a little frightened and hesitant to follow through and trust my instincts to guide me. With one foot in front of the other it may take a few times to GET IT…but eventually I get it and CAN get through it. That’s what happened when I was introduced to the all infamous turns in dance. I was excited to do them, because to me that’s what makes the dance most beautiful. Once it came time to turn, I questioned it half way through and would stop. Question every position and step. Once I was instructed to follow through and trust the push and pull, I finally let go and completed the turns. I think whenever we each have to turn some type of corner; some can be easier than others. Certain turns just require a certain amount of confidence to accomplish it.

“I am a dancer. I believe that we learn by practice. Whether it means to learn to dance by practicing dancing or to learn to live by practicing living.... In each it is the performance of a dedicated precise set of acts, physical or intellectual, from which comes shape of achievement, a sense of one's being. A satisfaction of spirit… One becomes in some area an athlete of God.” ~Martha Graham, c.1953

They say practice makes perfect and we all know nothing is perfect in life. But when we learn from our mistakes, we can practice to not make them again considering the consequences we may suffer. Considering dance, you can perfect your technique through the mistakes you make. Take a look in the mirror, and practice, practice, practice. There are times when you say to yourself “I will never do that again!” then a few months later, there you are again doing the same thing. That’s when you can remind yourself…even if it’s an entirely different situation practice can be applied. Just, it requires proper ACTION.

I believe that in all forms of experience.

At the end of the day, the four P’s can be applied in all directions. I think it’s just up to each individual to create their own path, poise, perfection and passion.

You are never alone when you dance… unless it’s when you’re alone in your car

Women Strong & Beyond

“Sure God created man before woman. But then you always make a rough draft before the final masterpiece.”-unknown

I took it upon myself to watch a Wendy Williams talk show. Her guests for the day were the “stars” from the Jersey Shore. Now are they really stars? What defines this group as celebrities? They exude absolutely no talent! On air, they maintain part time jobs at a Gelato Parlor. They are a high maintenance team who obsesses their routine of Gym. Tan. Laundry. And let’s not forget those fist pumps at the club; every night of the week.

Don’t get me wrong, I actually have seen the episodes from the first season. I caught the previews on MTV for the second season, and it seems as though fame has got to their heads which inspired them to physically fight and backstab each other even more…and let’s not forget those unlimited one night stands they are not ashamed to share.

“I love watching the Jersey Shore because they tell it like it really is!”-Anonymous Fan

How are they telling it like it really is? These guys have different women practically every night of the week and label them as D.T.F. (I’m sure you can figure that out) When it comes to one of the girls even dating a guy or bringing a guy home…the guys call her a variety of insulting words. Talk about a DOUBLE STANDARD! This isn’t how it really is, my friends. Disrespecting men sharing a house with women who don’t play on the same team? Will they be okay after their fifteen minutes of fame is up and their future children see their behavior? Maybe most of viewers see it as some type of humor. But allowing this as a vigorous “okay” to our society is demeaning in OH, so many ways. Especially when it is reflecting on us women out there who are nothing like this.

Not only does this behavior exist on the SHORE, but what about those YOUTube Videos of Girls fighting each other and tally their points to remain proud? What about the bullying against the girl who may look different from you and your friends? How about the jealousy of another girl, that riding revenge to have something you don’t? The list goes on and it’s happening everyday right before our eyes.

My friend Jamie and I always talk about how women need to be more on Team Girl. I think it is important that we follow our values and band together! There are so many of us women who succumb to other’s because we tend to care what they think of us. In reason, that maybe we should be or look a certain way in order to have friends or so that “society” will accept us. On the Real Housewives of whatever city it is now, these women prance around in drama infested waters and make money the number 1 priority in looking good, having everything and being GLAM! Girls, that’s not true. Who wants to be in a life like that? What makes women feel that they have to live up to these standards? It doesn’t take brains to do reality TV. In my opinion, it has been taken to a level that is beyond what life really is about. Officially, they have lost their way and themselves.

I cannot stand it when a girl gets jealous at the fact you “used” to date her now boyfriend. Really, there’s a reason why you’re not dating him…and it’s not because of you, honey. I know many of my friends have experienced this and there are boundaries when it comes to being friends with a guy. It’s easier for a girl to be friends with a guy than it is a guy to be friends with a girl. Friendships can even develop after a relationship, it IS possible. I have a guy best friend! Have you ever dated someone and realized “We are better off being friends”? Sometimes that is just how life works. Jealousy can be contagious and get in the way of enjoying the many things that love or a good friendship has to offer.

Jamie said that when she was in Vegas, they could either pay a ton for a taxi or spend $80 on a limo. Get 6 other girls, split the cost and talk about a cheap drive to the club! Jamie shouted out “Who wants to share a limo?” And 5 or so other girls jumped in and shared the cost. Usually, when you would shout that out, girls just glare and twitch their nose at you. Now, if that would happen all over the world, women would be saved a ton of energy and some spare change.

I remember my first time out with Jamie & Shannon in Vegas. They bought a ton of food and snacks for the room to save money from going out to eat. My Dear friend and I were offered to help ourselves to anything. Muffins, crackers and bottled water, it felt good to be welcomed that way without feeling as though we owed them something in the end. I can only remember a having a good time that weekend. it started a tradition of our “girls weekend” together…always bring something and share it. That includes food for the soul, wine for the heart and truthful advice for the one who may be lost on their path. It’s about sharing what you can while you can. It’s about the other women who can take advice, and learn from experience as a team. Not take it personally and get defensive or angry instead.

For instance, if a mutual friend knows your boyfriend is cheating; she should tell you. But what is it that holds us back from telling the truth? Is it our own humiliation of confrontation? Is it the rejection of your friend not believing you? Why can’t there be honesty in letting your friend know the truth? Whether it is confrontation or not; the protection of our womanhood is very valuable and we shouldn’t take it for granted.

There will definitely be more writing on the whole “TEAM Girl” factor….but for now, I wanted to leave you with some time to think…what can we as women do better to have our friendships stay valuable and always be appreciative and respectful to one another?

“We are women and we stick together.”

If a woman has to choose between catching a fly ball and saving an infant's life, she will choose to save the infant's life without even considering if there are men on base. ~Dave Barry