my friend named Steve.

its funny how the world works. when you think about it, its so very small.

you know how you meet someone because of someone? then you find out someone you know already knows them?

Thats how I met my friend named Steve.

his smile that lights up a room. blue eyes that can read right through you.

hes a man who invited me to live with his family. a wife and 3 beautiful girls.

he jokingly said "you cant move to san clemente, thats too far from us!"

i never took it seriously...but i think God was after me and a few days later i asked him if the offer still stood...it did.
and two weeks later I was moving in. the family graciously provided me with a room and our deal was that i help out with the kids for him to enjoy "date" nights with his soulmate. so i did.

i cant even begin to tell you how attached i grew the very first day.
i walked downstairs and right away a hot cup of coffee was offered to me and a warm hug from steve yelling "theres my adopted daughter!" we all laughed.

i was loved already. and I was ready to give the family all of my love.

you know its scary going into a home. because I knew the family, and even celebrated Steve's 41 st Birthday only a few months before. i thought for sure that behind closed doors was going to be a very different thing than the friendship i had built with them.

but it wasnt.

I had a chance to see Steve as a husband and a father. he never took anything for granted. especially the time he would spend with the girls. He even joined us one night at Ruby's when i was babysitting. it was so fun to observe and see the endless love he had for life and his family.

i can say he made me appreciate and want the same things for my own life.

i always enjoyed our conversations. he helped me so much along the way in the last 2 years. it was pure grace. he cared and wanted the best for me. he made me feel like i was a part of the family.

i can still remember our conversations, his voice, his advice, his laugh...and sometimes god lets him visit me, and he still puts a challenge up for me in my dreams.

he made an impact on so many lives.

"its not the years in your life, its the life in your years."

this past weekend I held a memorial golf tournament for Steve. It was so stressful trying to get everything in order in such a short time. I can say I prayed a lot...and I was so lucky to be guided by some of Steve's amazing friends.

we raised money for the girls education fund. It was such a healing process for me. I was stuck at one point...feeling sad...and never sure how to not be...because I know where he is. SO Happy!...So happy in fact, that words probably do not even fit a category to describe it completely.

when I was enjoying dinner at the tournament, i stopped and looked around. I saw so many of Steve's friends and family...all there for the same reason. to never forget such an amazing person. to give back and appreciate all he had given.

im so thankful for the love that has been shown to me by the Hagemeister family. you will never know how much you have changed my life. for the best. i sought a family...and i have been truly blessed.

In Memory of Steve
April 16th, 2010

"I thank my God upon every rememberance of you..." -phillipians 1:3